Flowers Out the Wazoo, Drapes Up the Hoo Hah

Flowers Out the Wazoo, Drapes Up the Hoo Hah

What better motivation to blog than when stuck sitting idly by as an Indian wedding proceeds.  Believe you me, an Indian wedding is a spectacle to behold – for those that haven’t ever witnessed it.  After you’ve attended a few, the traditional proceedings can appear borderline cumbersome.  So, when the goblin of monotony annoyingly tickles the brain stem of my attention, I consult alternate methods of entertainment.  The smartphone. Giggidy.

All of this weekend’s wedding festivities are taking place in the spectacularly mundane streets of Mactown.  The couple getting married today must’ve broken off a slice of expensive, gourmet bread.  They did it right.  Flowers out the wazoo, drapes up the hoo hah.  Fist tap and kudos to the bride and groom for doing it big.  I’ll actually be getting married in this same building (a Hindu temple) in less than six months.  My Cinnabun hails from the nook and cranny of Macon (Forsyth – the city, not the county) – so there really ain’t no other place to have a bloated wedding than at the temple.  We definitely ain’t got the means to go all out like this couple did.  However, what we lack in glitz, hopefully we compensate for in personality and creativity.  Or not.  Then again, who are we trying to tickle into a submission of irrepresible giggles?  We’ll probably be ready to be done with the whole wedding thing before it even begins (like every other couple).  We have grand aspirations of differentiating our wedding from hundreds others by being creative and unique.  We’ll see how long that motivation lasts (i.e. ish ain’t happenin’). Either way, my Brown caboose will be situated again in this very seat in a couple of weeks (there’s another wedding in this same temple).  We Brown folks love tying the knot.  We’re suckers for commitment I suppose.  “Oh…you love me?  Zas nice.  Let’s get married, bump uglies, pop out a few intolerable infants, and call it a day.  What say you?”

Ahh.  Brownies.  We’re an interesting breed indeed.  Another thing about Indian weddings is that they generally last for hours.  All the traditions and whatnot make it difficult to complete proceedings in less than a couple of hours.  I’ve been at weddings that have easily lasted three to four hours.  Like I said, it can get boring.  I’ve the slightest idea how I previously endured without the distraction of a smartphone.

I hope I’ll be able to stay updated on the Grizzlies-Thunder Game 7 later today.  Worst case, I’ll charge my little lady up and keep up with the score.  I’ve been meaning to jot down a few thoughts about some sports related topics recently, but haven’t gotten around to it yet.  I’ll write a comprehensive post about it in the near future (especially the NBA playoffs and my disappointing Lakers who were…well…who I thought they were).

‘Til then, I’m gonna catch the end of this wedding shenanigans on stage.  Folks are clapping, ladies are yelling, and things appear tantalizingly close to conclusion.  Yippee!

Whuh oh.  They cranked up some more music and the bride and groom look plenty comfortable in their seats.  Dammit, Chloe!  Talk about a no-look hook.

My stomach yearns for the greasy undertones of lunch.

One thought on “Flowers Out the Wazoo, Drapes Up the Hoo Hah

  1. Interesting post, I can’t wait to meet these intolerable infants of yours but in the meantime, I’ll be happy to nosh on the oil-laden masala’s of your wedding buffet 🙂

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