Chopped And Skrewed and Double Fist Taps

Chopped And Skrewed and Double Fist Taps

Yo yo yo…just when you thought that I went permanently AWOL….I’M BACK!!!

I was able to miraculously avoid posting a unsavory squadoosh in the post department last month (I somehow ended up writing 1 post).  December was quite a hectic couple of fortnights.  I broke my pledge of allegiance to this blog.  I neglected it…but hopefully…I can somehow remedy that in the coming months.

By the way, I can’t believe I am actually admitting this…but…I’m watching “A Double Shot At Love” on MTV…and it’s quite entertaining.  It’s the 2nd time I’ve seen this show and it isn’t half bad.  Will I keep up with this show?  Probably not (especially considering that 24 is starting this coming Sunday).  I’m not too keen (or dedicated) on keeping up with shows, but 24 seems to be the exception – at least it has been in the past.  I may even get around to keeping up with the 2nd most GENIUS syndicated show on TV:  Scrubs.   Lord knows that I stay tuned in to the 7pm re-runs on Comedy Central.  Although…I have to say that I got a legitimate beef with TBS.  They moved Seinfeld re-runs to 7pm.  How dare they make me choose between Seinfeld and Scrubs!  The audacity!  Have they no shame or dignity?  Is it not enough that I had to go months without being able to see “Ramsey’s Kitchen Nightmares” on BBC America during the 6pm afternoon slot?  But…that issue has been rectified because I am back to my FTA bootleggin’ ways!  Glory be to bootlegging!  I swear to you, if a politician’s candidacy and platform was entirely centered around bootlegging (and the support of it), I’d get in line at 2 am to vote for their ass.  Please believe.

Anyways, there were so many things that I wanted to write about the past month.  From watching Slumdog Millionaire (which did live up to the hype) to my birthday celebration to the New Year’s Eve festivities.  Ideally, I wanted to write an individual post for each one, but my lethargic and negligent ways have performed a literary cock-block maneuver on that…but…worry not my devout readers…I will paraphrase as best possible in this post.

Slumdog Millionaire was a great movie.  I didn’t think that it would live up to the locomotive of positive publicity that it rode in on to the mean streets of the A…but…it did.  I loved how they showed the “other” side of India…the real side of India:  the slums.  If you ever go to India, you may be shocked by the ubiquitous poverty that surrounds you at seemingly every turn.  Anyways, almost every Indian movie focuses on the affluent and privileged.  India is theatrically portrayed almost as if there was scant poverty.  But, Slumdog Millionaire opens a narrow peephole into the world of those who live in decrepitly meager and humble circumstances.   But, of course, like all Indian movies, the core plot of this movie centers around love and the insatiable quest for it.  The plot deals with a kid from the slums (Jamal Malik) who somehow finds his way on the show “Who Wants to be a Millionaire?” and facing the million dollar question.  When the show breaks for the evening, the police abduct Jamal and accuse him of cheating.  The story of his life is intertwined with every question he answers on the show.  It’s a pretty damn charming movie.  I can especially see why Westerners have been so favorable towards this movie so far.  India is an extremely intriguing country – and this movie exemplifies the chasm between the rich and the poor; between the privileged and the disenfranchised.  It is definitely a must-see.  It has been nominated for a Golden Globe for Best Picture and will probably get an Oscar nod for Best Picture.  I wish I could write a more detailed review of this movie, but this terse summary should suffice for those considering watching the movie.

By the way, this “Gran Torino” movie seems pretty good.  I don’t exactly know what it’s about, except that Clint Eastwood is supposed to be a pretty flagrant racist (which always has the potential for being an entertaining movie).  As shitty as racism is, it makes for intriguing theater.  Admit it.  Either way, Clint Eastwood is the rare director whose movies rarely disappoint.

Apparently, there has been quite the response to a post I wrote a while back telling Dane Cook and others to “Stop Making Movies!“.  There is quite an abundance of support…and hate…for Dane Cook.  Even though I implored others to abstain from producing shit flick after shit flick, folks seem to cling on to my comments pertaining to Dane Cook.  I can’t believe there were so many folks who disagreed with me…and actually thought that Dane Cook was a legitimate actor.  You have got to be kidding me.  His putrid acting reeks worse than month old tofu!  Anyways, if you’re interested in viewing the post and maybe dropping your own two cents, then click here.

All I gots to say about New Year’s Eve was that it FAR exceeded my expectations.  We paid for a 3-hour top shelf open bar – but were expecting to officially get “chopped and screwed“, but..we didn’t.  This was one of the very few times where we actually didn’t get our proverbial shit pushed in.  That sound you hear is me swiping my hand across my forehead and letting out a sigh of relief.  The open bar was legit.  We’re talking Crown, Patron, Henny, and Goose – and absolutely NO waiting in line!  You have got to be kidding me!  That definitely saved the beginning of the evening.  I say saved because when we arrived at the Westin Hotel in Perimeter, we felt as though we were misplaced into some antique roadshow.  The party seemed to be inundated with geriatric 30 and 40 year olds.  I mean, I know I’m an old ass man, but I felt like friggin’ jailbait at the beginning of the evening!  We couldn’t stop laughing when we arrived.  We were anticipating a wiggity wiggity party filled with folks sneaking in flasks of metamucil and poppin’ Levitra with their champagne toasts…but as the evening progressed (and the drinks kept flowing), the party started to get pretty dope.  By midnight, the place was packed and everyone was dancing and having a good time.  My crew and I had a great time.  I didn’t think we could top our experience at The Fox last year, but we did.  Big ups and mad kudos to the folks who threw the NYE party at the Westin.  It was another wise decision to stay in the A for New Year’s again.

A double fist tap to my friends for buying me a platform bed frame from IKEA for my birthday.  You know, I’ve never been too keen on celebrating my birthday, buy my friends always insist on doing so – and I am grateful for that.  I am very fortunate to have the people that I do in my life.  Regardless, we always have each others’ back – and when push comes to shove, we will be there for another.  It is a profound feeling to receive everything when you perpetually insist on wanting nothing.  Again, double fist tap for all who made my birthday memorable.  A tip of the hat to my my moms and grandma (both affectionately known by me as “mami” and “daadi” – pronounced “mum-mi” and “dah-di”) who cooked me a delicious homemade bday dinner of kofta and batura.  Mmmmm…..They were even swell enough to pack some in a tiffin for me to take home.  I’d say that dinner went over rather swimmingly.

I am inching closer to completing furnishing my joint.  I am done in terms of furniture and now want to set my focus on accents, lighting, and artwork.  Hopefully I can furnish my joint in a manner which screams “me” at the top of its lungs.

Time to enumerate Z’s.

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