The Line Between Happiness and Getting Paid

The Line Between Happiness and Getting Paid

Here I am, teetering and balancing myself on the line between happiness and getting paid. How can one possibly know when to cross that line? And to what side?? I have never really cared too much about money, seeing that I grew up without it, but I have always been, and will always be about the principle. I want to get paid what I am worth – regardless if I actually even care about the salary increase. If I am being vastly underpaid (which I feel I am), then that bothers me. To quote T.I. “I always made the money, money never made me”. I find myself in a professional conundrum: stay comfortable, happy, and underpaid OR get paid and leave everything else to chance. I have often pondered whether I would have even actually enjoyed what I am doing had it been for a mid-to-large size company. I think my comfortability at this job has so much to do with me finding solace and being at peace with what I do as a controls engineer. Who knows, if I had taken a shot with a big-shot company who treated every employee as more of a statistic than as an individual, I may have hated my profession and made some drastic changes. Who knows? I know I don’t. I wanted to give this job a wait-and-see approach and see how the future would play out here. And I still am taking that appraoch, but it seems that the wait-and-see time frame has been accelerated.

Am I ready to leave?? I don’t know. There are a few things that are going on in my life right now and I don’t really know if I am ready to uproot my professional career and take a chance on being a free agent again. I don’t know. But the fact that these thoughts are weighing so heavily in my mind right now make it incredibly hard to ignore the doubts and uncertainties that fester in my mind. If I decided that I didn’t want to even be in this field anymore, honestly, where would I go?? Start from scratch again and take an entry-level engineering job with another company?? That seems to be a highly undesirable option right now. Maybe go back to school?? Maybe eventually, but now? Not so sure. Who knows, maybe I will get paid at this job. That would alleviate some issues – and maybe all this hearsay and thought will be for naught. I am good at what I do and I am an intelligent engineer – so it concerns me that other engineers with less experience are vastly financially superior to me in terms of their salary. Something about that just doesn’t resonate so well with me. Again, it’s all about the principle…

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